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My two last years.
Never thought that I was perfect. Always thought that I had a purpose.The most difficult thing I ever did was recite my own words at a service. Technology made it easy for us to stay in touch while keeping a distance,
'til we just stayed distant and never touched. I don't remember much from my it. Maybe my memory is repressed. Or I just spent too much time wondering if I'd really lived. Fell in love for the first time but I didn't have the courage. It was a big deal. It was a blown cover. It was over for me. It became abundantly clear that I was only brought here to suffer. A year later, I came to understand that wasn't love that I was feeling .I had someone else to obsess over. For better or worse that's how I learned that it's best to just keep some things private. If my memory serves me correctly I made it a point to void and forget some things. Never meant to upset or give grief to my parents. Kept my secrets…hid my talents.In my head, never under the mattress.
Therapy couldn't break me.Never learned a word that would insure safety.As if everything that I was thinking would be exposed. It was beautiful. It was brutal. Heaven. It was hell. Used to wonder if I'd live to see 20. When I did I figured that I was immortal.I wanted the sympathy.
I'm gonna tell you how it is.
Don't listen when they tell you that these are your best years.
Don't let anybody protect your ears.
It's best that you hear what they don't want you to hear.
It's better to have pressure from peers than not have peers.
Beer won't give you chest hair. Spicy food won't make it curl.
When you think you've got it all figured out and then everything collapses…
Trust me, kid…it's not the end of the world.

Boy Stories
Minnet är en plats där man bara hör ekon och ser skuggor. Minnet är synens gråstarr och hörselns tinnitus. Det sliter i spindelväv.
- Carl Emil Englund
I serien Boy Stories (2006-2012) återvänder Johan Willner i tiden. Till en plats där något hände, till ett ögonblick som aldrig lämnat honom. Fotografierna skildrar minnesbilder från barndomen. Minnen som alla har omformats och färgats av tiden men som på något sätt alltid funnits kvar. I detaljrika fotografier presenteras filmiska scener från minnen, drömmar, tolkningar och ibland illusioner.
Mitt arbete tog sin början med en inre bild, ett minne. Det är kanske den starkaste bilden jag har upplevt någon gång och jag ville försöka ta den. Jag har letat efter bilder överallt, under många år. Jag har porträtterat människor, kulturer, landskap och religioner. Genom andra har jag försökt att uttrycka mig själv. Den här bilden har jag burit med mig. I minnet ser jag en pojke, han sitter i bilen och blöder från huvudet. Skolkamraterna står runt bilen och tittar på honom, hånar honom. Jag minns att han inte grät, att han aldrig tappade ansiktet.
- Johan Willner
